If you're like me, you LOOOOOOVE velvet paintings with a passion that can only be described as obsessive. I want them all: the good, the bad, the Elvises, the poodles, the faux Rennaissance girls on fainting couches, the men with big mustaches, the pretty sunsets and palm trees. Yes, my love for velvet jammed into wooden frames is equal opportunity. But, eh, there's only so much wall space, so compromises must be made. Get out the scissors and the sewing machine and recycle those paintings into pillas. The kitsch gods will shine down on you.